Mirror Mirror

Mirror mirror on the wall...I've been asking the mirror a lot of questions lately lol. I'm probably gonna drive myself crazy but what else is new. "Just live in the moment damnit," me talking to myself. Hell, I just hope one of those moments sprout a miracle.

See the thing is, we're all like the same person if you think about it (minus the legit crazies and a few other categories I'd rater not be associated with). But anyway, we all wanna be happy. Living our dream life, working our dream job, and while all of that seems like a fairy tale. It's actually attainable for those who actively pursue the life they want. Nowhere in that statement did I say achieving those things are easy, which is where the fun begins.

I find myself in an interesting yet unfamiliar place in my life. Possibly because I'm approaching my 30th year on the planet, some of you may be thinking, just 30, but hear me out. I"m a super competitive person but not in the normal sense of the word. Every year I wanna have a better year than the previous. 30 is a huge milestone for me. While, I believe I've made great strides in a lot of areas in my life, I'm at this strange place where nothing feels good enough to me.

And by no means am I speaking of praise or confirmation from others. But the actual feeling of accomplishment from myself. I'm human, no one hits a home run every time at bat, I get it. A good rut typically spawns a great comeback. So instead of letting my current predicament own me, I'm gonna embrace it. Although that may sound strange, the only way to pull myself out is to release how I feel into the atmosphere.

I mentioned living in the moment albeit jokingly, but I'm striving more and more to really live my life this way. By nature I'm type A in some ways, that's probably why I'm an accountant. But sometimes to find control you have to lose control. Everyday I let go a little more and believe a little more, I'm finally ready to make bold moves in my life. I'll admit I've been reluctant because it's not only me I have to worry about, I'm very protective of my son and cautious about how my moves will effect him. But when it's all said and done he'll brag about me haha...what in life is better than your kids being inspired by you?!?! Ummm NOTHING!!!

I'm not sure he'll brag about this post tho, I'm basically all dressed up with nowhere to go lol. I also don't know what any of this has to do with these pictures but that's just what I felt like writing about. I promise I'll be doing more interesting things when it gets warmer around here. I have no interest of leaving the house until then.

Photography: Ksenia